“Life does not look back.”

By Johanne Margarette Macob

 

“When we least expect it, life sets us a challenge to test our courage and willingness to change; at such a moment, there is no point in pretending that nothing has happened or in saying that we are not yet ready. The challenge will not wait. Life does not look back. A week is more than enough time for us to decide whether or not to accept our destiny.”

― Paulo Coelho, The Devil and Miss Prym

 

THE temperature is still largely what I was used to back in my not-so-long-ago college days: way lower than in my hometown. I’m also surrounded by seemingly the same types of people, but of course, individually different. I’m sitting in a corner at one of the famed malls in the so-called City of Pines, sipping my cold caffeinated drink, looking around. Oh, just like the old times!

I love the silence, the sound of the icy breeze gives me. It’s weird that it warms something in me, or perhaps, I just really missed this place.

A while ago, I was with a friend who’s more like a sister and now, I am waiting to meet another one, both my ex-boardmates. We shared dreams, and mostly everything there was to share — food and laughters and rants and stresses. We shared and gladly up to this day still are sharing a great friendship.

Last night, I asked my mom’s permission to go on a two-day-one-night trip here, making my requirements for some academic-related stuff as the reason. But apart from that purpose, I went here simply to see this place, anew — the city that’s in real close proximity to my heart, my school and everything and everyone that form parts of it that shaped a major part of me (both on a personal and professional level), the house that sheltered me for four years, and the people who have been my ‘family’ away from home. I am here to look back.

As per my longing, I remember so much.

I was a simple 16-year old when I and my family opted for me to have my tertiary schooling here after passing the entrance exam of what many would dub as one of the best universities here and even international. I remember crying in the first week of my freshman year due to homesickness, making me go down every weekend during my entire college life. Yes, I didn’t miss a single weekend at home! I did meet a lot of people, some ended up as my friends. Some of those friendships persist but some graduated along with my graduation. Oh well, that’s the way it is: some people in our life just come and go but I bet each of them has at least a lesson to impart to us, may that lesson be big or small. Just like this person beside me who I’ve known for half an hour now, she taught me further the value of congeniality as I just taught her a little of techie stuff…whatever.

Until tomorrow, I know I will be enjoying every single moment I have here despite some not really good memories that pop up in my mind triggered by some situations around me. Nonetheless, after this trip I’ll be going back to my normal routine. Well, we can look back but our lives cannot do likewise. The day will unfold at the same rate as usual, seasons will change according to their schedules. We are the ones adjusting to ‘life’, we are the ones living the ‘life’, not the other way around.

Let us not live in our pasts. Let us treasure the good memories and learn from the bad ones but let us not live in them. There is so much more to life to attend to or get busy with than lingering on something from yesterday we cannot change anymore. It is okay to look back for a moment and only for the purpose of realizing how one has become after getting through all the trials and learning from them, and not to regret decisions one has made, as this would be pointless. In the end, all we have and can still change is the present.

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