Punchline
Keystone firemen in the city
By Ermin F. Garcia Jr.
The news item about the discovery of Dagupan’s gallant firemen and fire volunteer brigades that the specifications of the city’s water hydrants are not compatible with their equipment is another sad commentary of how governance works around here.
Nostalgic images of the daring and courageous Keystone cops and firemen trying to put out a fire in a tall building with pales of water quickly came to mind.
It was ironic that while the city fire department ballyhooed its preparedness for the fire prevention month last month, little did we (and they) know that they were not effectively equipped (and yes, synched!) to put out any fire at anytime! While I don’t fault them for failing to anticipate such a potential problem when anything and everything is possible in this country, this is a wake-up call for our firefighters and law enforcers not to be complacent ever, as in ever in everything.
It’s simply beyond anyone’s comprehension how the city government could install fire hydrants without letting the fire station know its specifications for its guidance. The use of and reliance on a fire hydrant to extinguish a fire in an area is as elementary as getting the right bullets for a gun. Imagine a soldier fitting his armalite with .45 cal. bullets!
An investigation by the city council is urgent. Could this be another handiwork of another bright boy gone wrong? (Speaking of bullets, the city council might as well get down to brass tacks and check how many of our cops have fully-loaded guns).
* * *
GMA WAS CRUEL THAT DAY. Something tells me that our Mrs. President is truly in constant denial or absolutely in the dark on what’s happening with her government. Worse, I suspect she has been prevented from reading any news item or from watching late TV news on the various multi-billion scandals hounding her government by her over zealously protective staff in Malacanang and her members of the cabinet.
This became apparent when she told her audience on Bataan Day that the series of senate investigations and too much politicking are the cause of the crisis in the country, that these will further aggravate the crisis and certainly will not bring food to the tables of poor families in the country!
Hello?
Does she honestly think people share her belief that the senate investigations caused the people’s hardships today? That the investigations were merely prompted by politicking? That the fertilizer scam never happened? That nobody heard about the overpricing of the North Rail and South Rail projects? That nobody believed Engr. Jun Lozada when he said former Comelec chair Ben “Burjer” Abalos and her husband Mike meddled and attempted to pocket billions in commissions in the aborted NBN-ZTE deal? That nobody ever believed that her husband and son Mikey are suspected to be controlling jueteng in the country?
That nothing irregular attended the distribution of billions of funds intended for irrigation, for swine production? That the disappearance of billions of pesos intended for our farmers and the agri sector had nothing to do with the rice and food crisis? That none of her cronies in the rice cartel are being protected? That the congressmen, mayors and governors in this country were never bribed with cash each time they were called to the Palace? That our soldiers have not been dying uselessly while her generals pocketed the monies intended for their protection and subsistence?
No wonder her popularity rating plummets each time! She already believes her own lies, hook line and sinker!
If perhaps there were no rice and food crisis confronting millions of families today, her statement would have been perceived and shrugged off as comical and another perverted joke. But the crisis is here and real, yet she had the gall to portray her government to her poverty-stricken audience composed of aging veterans and their families, as spotless clean.
Her statement reflected the Arroyo government’s height of insensitivity, mocking our people’s intelligence to know what is real and what is not. At the very least, it was a display of wanton arrogance by a corrupt leadership that refuses to be held accountable.
That day, I thought I saw Mrs. Arroyo sadistically twisting a half-moon thick double-bladed knife embedded in a pierced eye of a hungry child! And her hapless audience could only cry and groan as they waited for their cue to applaud her performance.
* * *
THE ARCHBISHOP’S ‘SINS’. Our irreverent and outspoken Archbishop Oscar Cruz is now the object of another funny yet dangerous dig at character assassination as if threats to maim him, to convict him for libel or have him excommunicated by the Pope himself are not enough.
His enemies and detractors have reason to panic and to despair. In the Palace guards’ eyes, this “sonamagan Oscar” does not cease to sin against their gods and, is unrepentant. Worse, he has refused to accept ‘peace offerings’ (a.k.a. cash gifts from PAGCOR and PCSO) unlike other pliable bishops who even expressed willingness to be Mrs. Arroyo’s spokespersons. How dare he, indeed!
Among his unforgivable “venial sins” include branding PAGCOR as evil and organizing his Krusada ng Bayan Laban sa Jueteng and Krusada ng Bayan Laban sa Sugal. He readily provides protection and shelter to bona fide whistleblowers. He is keen on giving the “silent majority” a voice. He maintains a blog critical of evil governance. He giggles when reminded of his “sins”. (On a personal note, when we’re alone he insists on referring to Mrs. Arroyo as my “lola” and I’m not sure whether he means it as an affront to me or to her).
His “mortal sins” spell deadly. He has actively joined prayer rallies seeking Divine Intervention to make Mrs. Arroyo resign. He has proclaimed that he won’t ever give Holy Communion to public sinners (ouch!). He believes the Arroyo father and son rake in millions every day from jueteng operations. He is adamant about making Mrs. Arroyo accountable for all the corruption under her watch. And now, like the nuns of the Association of Religious Orders, he believes in Jun Lozada.
For his “sins”, the “hate-troopers” of the Palace have already unleashed initially a barrage of stories via text describing him as a man of many ugly faces. The text forwards tell of stories about this Oscar who is an incestuous man who keeps mistresses and boys on the side while hiding away an illegitimate daughter, keeps a big bank account, operating various illegal business activities yet refuses to pay taxes. Ha-ha-ha! The bulldog machos must surely eye him now with greenest envy though undeservedly.
At the rate the stories are being concocted, it would not be farfetched to read an account that describes the archbishop as a distant relative of Mrs. Arroyo who’s sour-grapping for not having been appointed a director of PAGCOR. Ha-ha-ha!
Or worse, that he is my real father! (Oops, guys now that will really hurt! That’s getting too personal and a low blow way below the ankles!).
(Readers may reach columnist at punch.sunday@gmail.com. For past columns, click http://sundaypunch.prepys.com/archives/category/opinion/punchline/
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