By Farah G. Decano

 

I was speaking to a confidential security detail of a VIP in a restaurant in Dagupan when the security’s knees suddenly vigorously moved up and down.  I had to inquire what triggered his annoyance.  He puckered his lips and used the same to point to a man seated two tables away. He claimed the other fellow was sizing him up. “And how did you know that?” I asked.  “Grabe siya kung makatingin. Kung wala ka lang, attorney, sasapakin ko na.”   I chuckled and instead challenged him to let it go.  “Eh, di hayaan mong makatingin.  Malay mo, gusto lang pala ang porma mo?”

In another occasion, a male friend, who was calmly driving along the interstate highway in California, unexpectedly blurted out,  “Sige… Sige… Tingnan natin kung kaya mong mag-overtake.”  He then intermittently looked at his rearview mirror and anxiously shifted to a higher gear.   I asked him what was going on. Obviously pissed, he said the car immediately behind us had been dangerously tailgating and repeatedly attempted to overtake.   I couldn’t help but advise, “Then let him overtake at baka may emergency sila.”  He did and his soreness came to a stop.

The irrationality of the male (even female) species can sometimes be amusing until it progresses to violence or road rage.

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The cancellation of senatorial aspirant Heidi Mendoza by some “woke” members of society because of her pronouncements against divorce and same-sex marriage has generated very interesting exchanges on social media.  Some say, ”Mahirap ipaglaban ang hindi ka kayang ilaban.”. Others say, “Good governance ang mas kailangan.”

Because of this, we can observe how people assert their values and defend their respective positions.  Based on the algorithm of my social media app, I have discovered many insightful and intellectual discussions on the matter.  And I now see less of the ad hominems such as “bobo ka kasi,” “tanga,” and “ma-rape ka sana.”

I understand the sentiments of some members of the LGBTQIA plus.  Their community has been persecuted, if not invisibilized, for centuries.  It is only in the recent decade that they have started to gain recognition and they are not willing to take a backseat at this point.

Heidi is just gunning for one out of the twelve seats in the Senate.  There are other sitting senators and candidates who are already taking on the LGBTQIA and divorce advocacies.  According to a colleague, Heidi has a proven track record in forensic accounting and in fearlessly going against generals. Undeniably, our country needs someone who possesses exceptional skills, experience, and the bravery to go against corruption.   Let us not waste our chance to bring to the Senate a veteran civil servant who has a unique knack for uncovering financial fraud and exposing those behind it without fear or favor.

 If we will liken the Senate to the Filipino “sinigang na bangus,” then we will need to ensure that the Senate has all the ingredients to become a good representation of the Filipino people.  If Rissa Hontiveros (LGBTQIA and women’s rights advocate) is already the “bangus,” perhaps Heidi (anti-corruption) is  the “sampaloc” that will complete the flavors in the senate.  If celebrity senators were salt, and they get elected/re-elected, then the Upper House will likely turn our tummies upside down/inside out.  Our once favorite sinigang will become too salty and unpalatable, and will leave a bad taste in the mouth, to say the least.

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Is the term “old maid” – the derogatory way of referring to single females past the marrying age of 30 – still used these days?  It is associated with characteristics of ugliness, bitterness, and extreme envy.

There is now a name for the male counterpart –  “incels” or involuntary celibates.   In other words, they who cannot get laid.  While the term may seem gender neutral, Incels is used to refer to men said to possess the similar negative traits of old maids, but with the addition of attributes of misogyny and violence.

There seems to be a stark increase of incels because of women empowerment and dating apps. Nowadays, women are more accomplished and usually prefer mates who are their equals or greater than them.   So far, only a small percentage of men can rise to the challenge of these empowered women leaving a majority of men in isolation and bitterness.
Incels have been a growing concern because of their destructiveness in society.  Perhaps,  government should study this and prepare to respond when the need for intervention arises.

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