Marriage?
By Atty. Farah G. Decano
A few days ago, Buhay Representative Lito Atienza was quoted saying, “[w]e do not believe in same-sex marriage because marriage is meant for a male and a female and the purpose is reproduction.” On the same day, Supreme Court Justice Marvic Leonen, in a seeming reaction to Atienza, tweeted, “So it will not make sense for senior citizens to marry? Or those who are not fertile? Asking for a friend.”
Is marriage really for the sole purpose of producing children? A review of my basic Christian doctrine classes tells me that it is for three purposes, and in this order: (1) participation in something divine which is procreation; (2) to silence the concupiscence of the flesh and (3) companionship.
Is it mandatory that all these Christian requirements for matrimony be fulfilled? Nothing is stated. I still see old people getting married before the Christian churches. There are non-childbearing couples who still decide to tie the knot.
How did marriage originate? There are many theories. Let me narrate one I know. Some anthropologists say that marriages did not really start as romantic relationships between two people. During ancient times, some men, together with several women, committed to live together for the purpose of childbearing and survival. The start of monogamous marriages between men and women was primarily for economic purposes. Because private properties became more valuable over time, families wanted to secure their possessions within the bloodlines of the male members. While men retained their right to be promiscuous, women were barred from engaging in multiple partners. Worse, they were married off to their husbands without their consent. Wifely duties were to bear children and take care of them.
The spread of Christianity somehow elevated the status of women as equals of men, in that, it gave importance to consent before they were wed to their husbands. As Christianity evolved, it imposed upon the husband more responsibilities in the family including taking only one woman for a wife. With the development of marriage as a bond between two consenting and childbearing individuals, the importance of romance in marriages eventually took shape. No longer just an economic institution or convenient arena for childbearing, marriage presently is a covenant of love between two persons with each promising to serve, to cherish and to sacrifice for the other.
It cannot be denied that love, nowadays, has become a compelling force for adults to finally tie the knot. Childbearing is no longer the sole reason for marriage. Although the offspring is a beautiful consequence of two individuals in union with each other, having one is no longer mandatory for marriage.
With childbearing no longer the only reason for marriage but love, can adult individuals of the same-sex get married? I do not wish to devalue the feelings of the LGBTQ plus community in the same way that I do not want to belittle the love between two sterile individuals. If we were to think of marriage as a covenant of love without the trappings of religion and legalism, then marriage is for all uncommitted and consenting adults.
Love is a higher concept of pleasure similar to liberty and democracy. They cannot be grasped and expressed merely by our sensory capabilities and appetites. They are ideas better appreciated by our superior faculties such as our intellect and wisdom. Hence, if individuals exclusively share their love with another under a solemn vow, their whole humanity is being manifested.
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