General Admission
Funny, funnier, funniest
By Al S. Mendoza
PRESIDENT Aquino has Bam Aquino in his Liberal Party senatorial slate for the May 2013 polls.
Vice President Binay has Nancy Binay in his UNA senatorial slate.
Notice the difference?
Well, as my L.A.-based friend Leonie Galvez loves to say, “The difference is the same.”
Bam Aquino is Mr. Aquino’s first cousin.
Nancy Binay is Jojo Binay’s daughter.
If Mr. Aquino weren’t president, do you think Bam Aquino, not yet 35 and who hasn’t even been a kagawad in a barangay, could snatch that much-coveted slot in the LP slate?
If Jojo Binay weren’t vice president, do you think Nancy Binay would ever corner a seat in the ticket of UNA (United Nationalist Association) that his powerful father heads?
OK, let’s go a bit further.
Senate President Juan Ponce Enrile has Jack Enrile in the UNA ticket, too.
Who is Jack?
He is “merely” JPE’s son.
The president of the republic, the vice president of the republic, and the senate president of the republic each tossing in a bet in tickets that turned away many who were more deserving than, well, cousin, daughter and son.
Who will question that?
Not even the current chief justice herself, I guess. Look what happened to Corona her predecessor. Mercilessly ousted, brutally uncrowned.
OK, you want more?
JV Ejercito is in UNA’s slate, too.
Isn’t JV the son of Erap, who isn’t only one of UNA’s three prime movers together with Binay and JPE but who is also a former president of the republic with an unquestioned clout that brings in massive votes from the masses of Filipino people?
Ah, Erap.
Why in heaven’s name did he also allow Dick Gordon to be in the UNA ticket?
Isn’t Gordon the same man Erap hosed with water to drive out of Subic when Gordon refused to vacate his SBMA offices in 1999?
Politics is also a haven for strange bedfellows, in case you have forgotten.
To buttress this, what is Mrs. Manny Villar doing in P-Noy’s LP ticket?
Weren’t P-Noy and Manny the bitterest of foes in the 2010 presidential elections?
And, yes, why are Jamby Madrigal and Mrs. Villar lumped together at the LP slate, when it was Madrigal who had pounced hard on an alleged road scam that Manny Villar had built and profited from government coffers?
And, yet, nobody’s dared to say both major tickets are littered with comedians and comediennes, if not downright fake leaders of the nation.
Yet, one was disqualified to run for senator because he said he was married to Kris Aquino, the president’s sister who has two children by different fathers.
Another was disqualified for saying he owns the entire Philippine archipelago, brandishing a “document” at the Comelec offices to prove his point.
Many others from the 88 senatorial aspirants (America had only 33 candidates in the recent November 7 polls) were disqualified for not having enough money to mount a nationwide campaign.
They cite all reasons to disqualify the poor but never a reason at all to disqualify the rich.
They are all funny, but funnier are those who judge who are fit and who are not.
Funniest are those who field their kin, saying they are the fittest of them all.
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