Exchanging Glances

By Al Mendoza

ON Dec. 29, 2007, Atty. Bonifacio Niño and teacher Silvina Estabillo were wedded for the fourth time in 60 years and, if only for that, I raise a glass to endurance, if not to one’s faith in the power of un-dying love.

They first got married in 1947 at the Mangatarem Catholic church, reprising it in 1972 and in 1997.

The first three weddings, both Tio Boni and Madam Soling exchanged “I do’s.”  Spoken.

On their fourth try, only unspoken “I do’s.”

Not intentional though.

Father Time was the culprit.

Tio Boni and Madam Soling also didn’t walk down the aisle this time as they were both on board a wheelchair.

Again, Father Time was the culprit.

Still, it was as poignant a scene as it can be, two lovers welded inseparably by time – straight out of a page of life’s actual drama.

Tio Boni, 88, and Madam Soling, 87, had renewed wedding vows by holding hands, by exchanging glances, by not saying a word.

“How lucky we are to have witnessed the beauty of eternal love unfolding right before our very eyes,” said the officiating priest, Bishop Bacani, or words to that effect.

Still unbent by time, Tio Boni though now sports a plastic tube inserted in his nose.

“That’s where the food passes through now for my Dad,” said Dan, Tio Boni’s eldest son.

Dan’s one of my dearest buddies from childhood, who promised to retire in November after 25 years as a government factotum in California.

“I’ll go to farming, hopefully in Bani, after retirement,” Dan said, who added he missed Jun Velasco during the wedding.

Together with Dan, we were known as the Lennon-McCartney tandem in our Beatle mania days in Mangatarem to include Teody Lalas, Natnit Baptista and Caloy Rufo.

I knew Tio Boni as a lover of life, who worked using dignity as his chief weapon. He retired with distinction at the Bureau of Internal Revenue after serving as councilor in Mangatarem in the Fifties.

Madam Soling was a teacher of note – the spoiler of kids in contrast to Tio Boni the super strict drill master.

“The minute my Dad would start to threaten us with the belt or the bamboo stick, my Mom would immediately come to our rescue,” said Dan in his speech during the wedding reception.

Except for Thelma, who lives in California, all of Dan’s siblings and their respective espouses came home: Ramon (Toronto), Mila (Fresno, CA) and Dot (Chicago). Dagupan-based Amor and Cavite-based Alex also came along, with April Niño (Alex’s daughter) unleashing her singing prowess to the delight of the guests.

Dr. Perla Legaspi of UP-Diliman waxed sentimental as she reminisced on Madame Soling’s unselfish tutoring on her.

Regino Niño, the former vice mayor of Bani, spoke eloquently of Tio Boni’s big brotherly ways.

Dot, Dan’s favorite sis, awed the crowd with her ballroom dancing talent in an exhibition with her chubby hubby, Gerrie, even as Denver (Dan’s only child) delivered a well-applauded talk extolling the Niño clan using the letters N-I-N-O as his take-off.  Nice one, Denver, and here’s one for creativity.

What stood out in the end, however, was the unity exhibited by Dan and his siblings. Even as their parents weren’t exactly aware anymore of what was happening around them (Tio Boni has the Parkinson’s and Madam Soling the Alzheimer’s), the kids plodded on to shoulder home one stinging, heart-piercing message: This is for our parents, nothing more.

Here’s a glass to a vow of unending love for our parents.

I kissed the hands of both Tio Boni and Madam Soling right after the wedding at the church – even if they didn’t recognize me anymore as the kid who used to “spirit” their Dan away for impromptu renditions of Beatles greats.

At the reception, I paid tribute to the couple again by approaching them up the stage.

Tio Boni, a crown of silver to embellish a still unwrinkled face like Madam Soling, gave me the usual blank stare and I understood it fully well. He has become but a mere fraction of his old, handsome self. He is basically living out now the last hues of the lengthening shadows of his mortality.

But I was  deeply  touched when, as I was walking back to my table, Madam Soling  waved  her hand at me after I had waved my hand at her.

The look in her eyes said it all: They were saying, “I know that kid. He must  be Dan’s  playmate, John Lennon.”

(Readers may reach columnist at also147@yahoo.com. For past columns, click http://sundaypunch.prepys.com/archives/category/opinion/general-admission/ For reactions to this column, click “Send MESSAGES, OPINIONS, COMMENTS” on default page.)

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